大學英語小笑話短文閱讀
笑話是民族文化不可或缺的一部分。透過笑話我們可以看到一個民族的生存環境、生活方式、社會關係和心理特徵等等。小編精心收集了大學英語小笑話短文，供大家欣賞學習!
都在這一家
Eight-year-old Sally brought her report card home from school .
八十歲大的 莎莉從學校把她的成績報告卡帶回家。
Her marks were good mostly .
她的成績不錯，
A's and a couple of B'S .
大部分都是A，還有幾個B。
However ,her teacher had written across the bottom,
可是， 她韻老師在卡片下方寫道：
"SALLY is a smart little girl,but she has one fault,
“莎莉是個聰明的小女孩，但是她有一個毛病。
she talks too much in school.I have an idea I am going to try,
她在學校太愛講話。我有一個想法我要來試試看，
which I think may break her of the bad habit."
我認爲.這個想法可能會讓她改掉這個壞習慣。”
Sally's dad signed her report card,
莎莉的爸爸簽了她的學習報告卡，
putting a note on the back ,
並在卡片背面註記：
"Please let me know if your idea work on SALLY
“如果你的想法對莎莉很有效，請你讓我知道，
because I would like to try it out on her mother."
因爲我想要把它試用在她媽媽身上。
大學英語小笑話短文：If only倘若
A man is driving up a steep,narrow mountain road .
有個男人駕着車沿着一條又陡峭又窄小的山路往上開。
A woman is driving down the same road .
有個女人沿着同一條路往下開着車。
As they pass ench other ,
當他們彼此錯車時，
the woman leans out of the window and yells"PI!!"
這個女人斜靠着車窗向外太喊：“豬!”
The man immediately leans out of his window and replies, "BITCH!!"
這個男人立刻也斜靠着他的車窗向外大聲響應：“臭女人.!”
They each continue on their way ,
他們各自繼續開車上路，
and as the man ronds the next corner ,
當這個男人繞到下一個轉彎處的時候，
he crashes into a pig in the middle of road .
他競撞上了在路中央的一隻豬。
If only men would listen.
倘若男人會聽話就沒事了。
大學英語小笑話短文：The visit to the doctor拜訪醫師
A Man asked his doctor if he thought he'd live to be a hundred .
一個男人問他的醫師是否認爲他會活到一百歲。
The doctor asked the man ,"Do you smoke or drink ?"
醫師問這個男人：“你抽菸或喝酒嗎?”
" No ,"he replied , "I have never done either ."
他回答說：“不，我從不抽菸喝酒。”
" Do you gamble,drive fast cars ,and fool around with woman?" inquired the doctor .
醫師問說：“你賭博、開快車、玩女人嗎?”
"No,I have done any of those things either."
“不，我也從不幹那些事情。”
"Well then," said the doctor ," what do you want to live to be a hundred for?"
醫師說：“那你幹嗎要活到一百歲呀?”
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