英語爆笑笑話6則
下面小編給大家整理的英語爆笑笑話，希望大家會喜歡。
英語爆笑笑話一：媽媽在砸瓶子
A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup to come out of the bottle. During her struggle the phone rang so she asked her four-year-old daughter to answer the phone. The child said, "Mommy can't come to the phone right now. She's hitting the bottle."
一個婦人正在使勁打開番茄醬的瓶子。這時，電話鈴響了，她叫四歲的女兒去接電話。小孩說：“媽媽現在不能接電話，她在砸瓶子。”
英語爆笑笑話二：The Nice Wedding Gift
We attended the wedding of an acquaintance's son. Because we did not know the young man or his bride, we decided to send them a practical household gift, a fire extinguisher. Apparently, the couple mass-produced their thank-you notes because we received a card saying: "Thank you very much for the nice wedding gift. We look forward to using it soon.
我們參加了一個熟人的兒子的婚禮。由於我們都不認識那個年輕人和他的新娘，所以我們決定送給他們一個實用的全家禮----一個滅火器。很明顯，這對新人大批量製作了他們的感謝信，因爲我們收到了一張卡片，上面寫着：“非常感謝您的漂亮的結婚禮物，我們期待着不久就用到它。”
英語爆笑笑話三：The Use of a Handsaw
At the mall, my wife and I picked up some hardware items, including a handsaw. We were heading back to the car when we passed a steakhouse.
Let's try it. " my wife suggested. Although I felt a little foolish carrying the saw, I followed her inside.
Scanning the menu, my wife told the waitress, " I' 11 have chopped sirloin, please.
The waitress turned to me, eyed my saw and commented, "And I see that. you, sir, have come for our T-bone special.
在集市上，我和妻子買了一些五金用品，包括一個手鋸。我們返回汽車時剛好路過一家牛排店。 “我們嚐嚐吧，”我妻子建議說。儘管我覺得拿着鋸有點傻乎乎的，但還是隨她走了進去。 我妻子掃視了一下菜單對女招待說：“請給我來一份炒牛腰片。” 女招待轉向我，看了看我的鋸，說道：“我能看出，先生，你是來吃我們的T形骨特色菜的。”
英語爆笑笑話四：瘋人院 The Looney Bin
Late one night at the insane asylum (瘋人院)one inmate shouted, "I am Napoleon!”Another one said, "How do you know?"
The first inmate said, "God told me!"
Just then, a voice from another room shouted, "I did not!"
一天晚上，在瘋人院裏，一個病人說：“我是拿破崙!”另一個說：“你怎麼知道?”第一個人說：“上帝對我說的!”一會兒，一個聲音從另一個房間傳來：“我沒說!”
英語爆笑笑話五：我要做的一切就是付錢!All I do is pay
"My family is just like a nation," Mr. Brown told his colleague. "My
wife is the minister of finance, my mother-in-law is the minister of war,
and my daughter is foreign secretary."
"Sounds interesting, " his colleague replied. "And what is your
position?"
"I’m the people. All I do is pay."
布朗先生告訴同事說：“我的家簡直就象一個國家一樣。我妻子
是財政部長。我岳母是作戰部長，我女兒是外交祕書。”
“聽上去挺有意思的，”他的同事說，“那你的職務是什麼呢?”
“我就是老百姓。我要做的一切就是付錢。”
英語爆笑笑話六：喂狗 For the Dog
The family seated in a restaurant had finished their dinner when Father Called over the waiter.
"My son has left quite a lot of meat on his plate," explained Father, "Could you give me a bag so that I can take it home for the dog?"
"Gosh, Dad!" exclaimed the excited boy. "Have we got a dog then?"
一家人在飯館裏吃過晚飯，父親把服務生叫了過來。
”先生，什麼事?“服務生問。
”我兒子的盤子裏剩下許多肉，“父親說，”能給我們一個袋子嗎?我把剩下的東西帶回去喂狗。“
”啊呀，爸爸!“兒子激動地叫喊着。”咱家養狗了嗎?“
