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幽默趣味英語小笑話

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“哪裏有人,哪裏就有笑聲。”從古到今,笑話是人們生活中不可缺少的“調劑品”。笑話使人們在刻板的生活中感到一絲快意和放鬆,在人們的日常生活中起着重要調劑作用。下面本站小編爲大家帶來幽默趣味英語小笑話,歡迎大家閱讀!

padding-bottom: 100%;">幽默趣味英語小笑話

幽默趣味英語小笑話:爸爸寫的遺囑

My father, who was 14 years old than my mother, had been working on his will. At a family dinner he told us that he had provided well for mother, but the family home would go to us five children if she remarried.

我爸比我媽大14歲,最近一直在寫遺囑。一次家宴上,他告訴我們說他爲母親以後的生活作好了安排,但如果她改嫁的話,家裏的房子將歸我們五個孩子所有。

"I don't want another S.O.B. toasting his shins(小腿骨) around my fireplace," he explained.

“我可不願意另外哪個狗孃養的在我的火爐旁烤他的狗腿,”他解釋道。

With a sly grin, Mother cracked, "What makes you think I'd marry another S.O.B?"

媽媽狡猾地咧了咧嘴,譏誚道:“你怎麼認爲我會再嫁給一個狗孃養的?”

 幽默趣味英語小笑話:三個商人的不同招牌

Three competing store owners rented adjoining(毗連的) shops in a mall. Observers waited for mayhem(故意的傷害罪,蓄意的破壞) to ensue.

三個互相爭生意的商店老闆在一條商業街上租用了毗鄰的店鋪,旁觀者等着瞧好戲。

The retailer on the right put up huge signs saying, Gigantic Sale! and Super Bargains!

右邊的零售商掛起了巨大的招牌,上書:大減價!特便宜!

The store on the left raised bigger signs proclaiming, Prices Slashed! and Fantastic Discounts!

左邊的商店掛出了更大的招牌,聲稱:大砍價!大折扣!

The owner in the middle then prepared a large sign that simply stated, ENTRANCE.

中間的商人隨後準備了一個大招牌,上面只簡單地寫着:入口處。

幽默趣味英語小笑話:園藝手套

For months I hinted that I needed a new wedding ring, since I had developed an allergy to gold. On my birthday, while I was gardening, my husband asked me for gift suggestions. I held my hands up and said, "Well, you'll notice that my hands are bare."

幾個月以來,我一直在向丈夫暗示我需要一枚新的結婚戒指,因爲我對黃金有點過敏。生日那天,我正在幹園藝活時,丈夫問我想要什麼禮物,我舉起雙手說:“嗯,你肯定看到了,我的兩手都是光光的。”

Later that evening I opened my present with enthusiasm. "Happy birthday," he said, as I unwrapped(打開) a new pair of gardening glove.

那天晚上,我滿懷熱情地拆開了丈夫送的禮物,“生日快樂!”他說。我打開一看:裏面包着一雙園藝手套。