生活艱辛時也請別忘記的13件事大綱

We’ve all gone through hard times. And we all get through them. However, some get through them better than others. So what is their secret? Most of it has to do with attitude. Here are 13 things to remember when life gets rough:
我們都有過灰暗的日子，最後也都熬過來了。然而有些的人心態會比其他人要好，他們的祕訣是什麼？其實主要就是取決於你的態度罷了。看看生活艱難時可以做的13件事吧。

1. What is, is
坦然接受現實

Buddha’s famous saying tells us: “It is your resistance to ‘what is’ that causes your suffering.” Think about that for a minute. It means that our suffering only occurs when we resist how things are. If you can change something, then take action! Change it! But if you can’t change it, then you have two choices: (1) either accept it and let go of the negativity, or (2) make yourself miserable by obsessing over it.
佛教有句經典的話：“你的痛苦都源於對現實的抗拒。”好好想想這句話。這意味着只有當你不接受現實時纔會產生痛苦。如果你能改變什麼，那就開始行動吧，改變它！但如果無法改變，你就有兩個選擇，（1）要不去接受要不就忽視消極的部分，或者（2）不斷的折磨自己讓自己更加痛苦

2. It’s only a problem if you think it’s a problem
只有你覺得這是個問題的時候纔會是個問題

Many times, we are our own worst enemy. Happiness is really dependent on perspective. If you think something is a problem, then your thoughts and emotions will be negative. But if you think it’s something you can learn from, then suddenly, it’s not a problem anymore.
很多時候，我們是自己最大的敵人。幸福取決於你的觀察角度。如果你覺得一件事是個問題，那麼你的想法和情緒都會變得消極。但如果你覺得這是學習的好機會，看看，突然就不是啥問題了。

3. If you want things to change, you need to start with changing yourself
如果你想改變什麼，那就從改變自己開始吧

Your outer world is a reflection of your inner world. Don’t you know people whose lives are chaotic and stressful? And isn’t that largely because they feel chaotic inside? Yes, it is. We like to think that changing our circumstances will change us. But we have it backwards—we need to change ourselves first before our circumstances will change.
你的外在是內在的一個反應。你難道不覺得那些外表看起來亂糟糟亞歷山大的人們其實內心也是一團亂麻麼？的確是這樣。我們總是覺得改變環境就能改變自己。其實我們弄反了-我們需要先改變自己才能隨之改變環境。

4. There is no such thing as failure—only learning opportunities
沒什麼失敗-這只是一個學習的機會而已

You should just wipe the word “failure” right out of your vocabulary. All great people who have ever achieved anything have “failed” over and over. In fact, I think it was Thomas Edison who said something like, “I did not fail at inventing the light bulb, I just first found 99 ways that it didn’t work.” Take your so-called “failures” and learn something from them. Learn how to do it better next time.
把“失敗"這個詞從你的字典裏抹去吧。很多成就大事業的人都曾不止一次的失敗過。實際上，我非常贊同愛迪生說的那句話”我從來沒有在發明燈泡的過程中失敗過，我只是找到了99種不可行的辦法而已。“把你那些所謂的”失敗“當成學習的機會吧。學着下次怎麼做的更好。

5. If you don’t get something you want, it just means something better is coming
如果沒有得到想要的，只說明你值得擁有更好的

That’s hard to believe sometimes, I know. But it’s true. Usually, when you look back at your life, you will be able to see why it was actually a good thing that something didn’t work out. Maybe the job you didn’t get would have made you spend more time away from your family, but the job you did get was more flexible. Just have faith that everything happens exactly the way it’s supposed to.
有時候的確很難去相信，但這絕對是真的。通常，當你回過頭看一看，就會發現正是一些事沒有成功纔會有後面的好事發生。也許那個沒有拿到手的工作會讓你無比繁忙沒法陪家人，而最後獲得的職位上班時間更加自由。只要相信，每件事都會有暗藏的方向。

6. Appreciate the present moment
珍惜當下

This moment will never come again. And there is always something precious about every moment. So don’t let it pass you by! Soon it will just be a memory. Even moments that don’t seem happy can be looked upon as something that you might miss someday. As the country song by Trace Adkins says, “You’re gonna miss this…you’re gonna want this back. You’re gonna wish these days hadn’t gone by so fast… may not know this now, but you’re gonna miss this…”
正當時一去不復返。每個時刻都有寶貴的東西。所以不要讓時間匆匆溜走！很快現在也會成爲你回憶的一部分。每個你不快樂的時光在日後都會成爲你去想念回憶的部分。就想Trace Adkin在鄉村歌曲裏唱的那般：”你會去懷念，會想重頭再來。你會希望這些日子沒有飛速流逝，也許現在你不知道，但你真的會去想念“7. Let go of desire
減少慾望

Most people live with “attached mind.” What this means is that they attach themselves to a desire, and when they don’t get it, their emotions plummet into negativity. Instead, try to practice “detached mind.” That means that when you want something, you will still be happy whether you get it or not. Your emotions remain happy or neutral.
很多人在”慾望中“生存。也就是他們會把自己和慾望緊緊聯繫在一起，當沒有得到滿足，他們的就會產生消極的情緒。與其這樣，不如試着給自己的思想減負吧。意思就是你想要什麼的時候，無論得到沒得到都會一樣的開心。你的情緒不會受到太大的干擾。

8. Understand and be grateful for your fears
理解感激你的恐懼

Fear can be a great teacher. And overcoming fears can also make you feel victorious. For example, when I was in college, I feared public speaking (one of the top 3 fears of all humans). So I find it humorous now that not only do I speak in front of a group every day by being a college professor, I also teach public speaking! Overcoming fears just takes practice. Fear is really just an illusion. It’s optional.
恐懼可以是你的好老師。戰勝恐懼也能讓你更加強大。比如，我讀大學的時候，我害怕公開演講（這大概是排名前三會讓人類恐懼的事情）。然而現在我不僅會作爲一個大學教授每天在一羣人面前說話，還會教公開演講的課程，這真是非常有意思的事情。戰勝恐懼需要聯繫。恐懼只是幻覺，就看你的選擇了。

9. Allow yourself to experience joy
允許自己享樂

Believe it or not, I know way too many people who don’t allow themselves to have fun. And they don’t even know how to be happy. Some people are actually addicted to their problems and the chaos in them so much that they wouldn’t even know who they are without them. So try to allow yourself to be happy! Even if it’s just for a small moment, it’s important to focus on joy, not your hardships.
信不信，我知道很多人都不允許自己玩樂。他們甚至不知道如何開心。有些人深陷自身麻煩和煩擾無法自拔甚至不願意試圖去擺脫。所以要讓自己開心起來！哪怕是很短的時間，好好的樂一樂非常重要，不要總是執迷於痛苦。

10. Don’t compare yourself to other people
不要跟別人比

But if you do compare yourself, compare yourself with people who have it worse than you. Unemployed? Be grateful that you live in a country that gives unemployment compensation, because most people in the world live on less that $750 a year. So you don’t look like Angelina Jolie? Well, I bet there are more people who don’t than do. And you are probably way better looking than most people. Focus on that.
如果真的要去比，那就把自己和比你差的人拿來比較吧。失業？感激你的國家還有失業保障制度吧，世界上大部分人年薪不到750美金。自己沒有安吉麗娜朱莉那麼漂亮？好吧，我覺得基本上大家都滿足不了這點。而且你絕對比大部分人好看。多想想這些吧。

11. You are not a victim
你不是受害者

You need to get out of your own way. You are only a “victim” of your own thoughts, words and actions. No one “does” something to you. You are the creator of your own experience. Take personal responsibility and realize that you can get out of your hard times. You just need to start with changing your thoughts and actions. Abandon your victim mentality and become victorious. From victim to VICTOR!
你需要從自己的框架中走出來。你只是自己想法、語言和行爲的受害者。其他人不能對你做任何事。你是自己生活的導演。對自己負責，相信自己有能力走出困境。你只需要改變自己的想法和行動。把那種受害者心理趕走，積極點吧，從受害者轉爲成功者！

12. Things can—and do—change
事情可以——絕對可以——改變

“And this too shall pass” is one of my favorite sayings. When we are stuck in a bad situation, we think that there is no way out. We think nothing will ever change. But guess what? It will! Nothing is permanent except death. So get out of the habit of thinking that things will always be this way. They won’t. But you do need to take some sort of action for things to change. It won’t magically happen all on its own.
“一切都會過去的”是我最喜歡的一句話。當我們身處困境，感覺毫無出路。我們覺得一切不會好轉了。但猜猜會怎樣？會好起來的！除去死亡沒有什麼是永恆的。所以不要再去固執的認爲事情會一成不變了。都會變的。你需要行動起來做出改變。事情不會自己神奇的去發生轉變的。“

13. Anything is possible
一切皆有可能

Miracles happen every day. Really—they do. I wish I had enough space to write about all the miraculous things that have happened to people I know—from healing stage 4 cancer naturally to having their soul mate appear out of nowhere. Trust me: it happens all the time. You just need to believe it does. Once you do, you have won the battle.
每天都有奇蹟。真的是這樣。我真希望有足夠的空間寫下那些發生過的奇蹟-從四期癌症中自然治癒到突然遇到另一半。相信我：奇蹟一直都在發生。你只需要去相信。一旦你信了，就贏了。