爆笑圍觀:在華老外必備"蹲廁手冊"
The "western" toilet is making inroads into China and in big citiesand airports, you'll find a few of them in the row of toilets inthe bathroom. However, there are still lots and lots and lots ofsquatty potties and likely as not, you'll venture into one. It'snot as hard as it seems, but it's good to know what you're gettinginto before you go.。。
“西方”座便式廁所現在已經在中國非常普遍了，大城市和機場裏面基本都有，你也可以在浴室裏面看到一排這樣的廁所。然而，還是有超級超級超級多的蹲便式廁所存在着，如果你要去中國旅遊了，那你可得試着冒冒險去用這樣的廁所。不過其實也沒有看起來那麼難，但是學學怎麼使用總是對你去中國旅遊有點幫助。1. Pack Tissues.
1. 裝好衛生紙Before you even leave the hotel, make sure you'vegot portable toilet paper with you. Lots of public restrooms don'tprovide it. Wet wipes and hand sanitizer are also good to havealong as if there's a sink, there may not be any soap, and probablyno towels either。
你離開酒店之前一定要檢查一下自己有沒有帶衛生紙，因爲中國的廁所是沒紙的哦。消毒紙巾和洗手液也可以帶上，如果廁所裏有水池的話你能用得上，因爲這裏的廁所很少會提供肥皂，當然也不用想擦手的衛生紙了。
2. Plan Your Business 1.
2. 計劃你的旅遊A"Preventive Peeing" or going before you gois a good way to avoid getting caught in a place that won't have anice toilet. (Nice doesn't necessarily mean Western by the way。)Pretend you're all five years old and make sure everyone goesbefore you leave the house。
“預防你的小便”或者說在你出發前你得想到你要去的地方可能沒有一個讓你覺得舒服的廁所(這裏的舒服不是說只有俺們外國的才最舒服，中國的廁所其實沒啥不好的)你就當自己是個五歲的小孩，出門前一定要尿尿。然後大家一起出發別落下任何一個人。3. Plan Your Business 2.
3. 計劃你的旅遊BIf you're going to be out and about, thinkabout where you'll be and try to plan some pit-stops in cially in big cities, international hotels, upscale restaurantsand shopping malls will have clean washrooms with most of theamenities (toilet paper, Western toilets, soap and towels)esto avoid using the bathroom: large markets (especially outdoormarkets)， street-side public bathrooms (though they're improving)，tourist spots。
如果你要出門，考慮一下你要去的地方在哪，計劃哪裏可以有停車休息站。尤其是在大城市，一些國際連鎖酒店，高檔餐廳和購物商場裏會有很乾淨的洗手間，那裏一般都會提供我們需要的便捷措施(比如衛生紙，我們用的座便，肥皂和擦手巾)，不過請避免使用這些廁所：大超市(尤其是那種室外的超市)，路邊的公共廁所(即使現在已經改善很多了)，還有就是旅遊點的廁所。4. Bag Hand-Off。
4.別帶你的包If you can, hand any unnecessary bags to a friend while you use thewashroom. There are generally no hooks and you'll need your handsto balance, to dig around your purse for tissues and to hold on tothe door if the lock is broken。
如果可以的話，去廁所前把你不必要的東西都讓你的朋友保管，通常情況下這裏沒有掛鉤讓你掛包包，你要是拿着一堆東西去廁所你就得在裏面努力保持平衡，然後在包裏找你的衛生紙，如果那個門的鎖壞了你還得把門扶着。5. Queuing Up.
5. 排隊這件事兒If you find yourself outside the comfort of yourhotel, don't panic. It won't be unbearable. Queues in China don'twork the same way as they do in the States. Women generally line upin front of a particular stall rather than hang back as one can create a free-for-all so it's best to stick to one doorand keep your eye on it. If it happens not to be a Western toilet,better to get in there than re-queue. Many times, doors havepictures or signs indicating Western or squat-style toilets. Also,check the lock, if it's red, then it's occupied. Green means freebut always knock。
如果你發現你自己已經不在那個舒服的旅店外了，別難過。這不是那麼難忍受的事情。排隊這件事在中國雖然不那麼流行不過我們在美國也有不排隊的時候不是嗎。女廁所裏面大家經常是一個個排在各個廁所前，並不是說在每個門前都晃來晃去等誰出來了就進去。所以說你得看準了自己等待的那個廁所位置並且一直盯着。如果前一位上完廁所出來你不幸的發現這不是座便器，我建議你最好還是進去吧，不然你又要重新排隊了。不過很多情況下，門上面都會有標準註明那個是蹲廁那個是座便。還有一點要記着，上廁所前檢查一下門鎖，如果上面顯示轉到紅色，那就是鎖上了，要是綠色那就表明裏面沒人。6. Pants Check.
6. 檢查好你的褲子I don't want to scare you but some washrooms arerather wet - either from splash effect or the toilet maid (usuallythere is someone assigned to sit in the washroom and clean it)running amok with her mop. Either way, it's not moisture you wanton your new linen trousers. If it's wet, roll them up, especiallyif you're in line for a squat toilet. If you see other Chineseladies rolling, then be sure to. They know something youdon't。
我這不是要嚇唬你，可是很多洗手間真的很潮溼，不管是飛濺的水弄的還是打掃衛生間的人(通常情況下每個洗手間會被分配有人打掃)瘋狂甩着她的拖把弄的。我知道，這些水不是你想弄到你的新褲子上面的。如果說地上很溼的話，記得把你的褲腿捲起來。尤其是你在排隊等你的座便廁所時。有個小竅門兒，你要是看到中國的女士把褲子都捲起來了，那你肯定要照做啦！她們知道的肯定比你多，學着點兒吧。7. The Squat.
7. 蹲下OK, well, you've found yourself in a squatty p's really not that bad and many argue it's actually healthier togo this way than sitting down. Whatever, if you're not used to it,squatting can be really difficult. Face forward and try to let yourpants down while ensuring that the ends are up (hopefully you'verolled) and not touching the floor. There are grooved places foryour feet on either side of the toilet. Try to get somewhere in themiddle, feet flat on the floor (you don't want to fall in, believeme) and aim for the potty。
好吧，試想你現在面對着一個蹲廁的坑坑。我得說一下，蹲廁沒那麼壞，很多人都說蹲廁比座便式廁所幹淨健康的多呢。無論如何吧，如果你不習慣用蹲廁，那麼蹲下真的是個挺難的事兒。你需要面對前方然後確保你的褲腳卷子來之後再蹲下(希望你在等廁所那會就已經卷起來了)這樣你的褲子就不會捱到地上了。在蹲廁兩側會有那種帶紋路的地方是供你的腳踩的。試着把你的腳各放在它們的中間，腳踩穩了(相信我，你也不希望自己掉進去)最後要對準那個坑。8. Paper Discard
8. 扔掉衛生紙Not in the Pot! Chinese plumbing in publicrestrooms generally doesn't handle paper. If you can remember,please put anything other than #1 or #2 in the basket. Try as hardas you can NOT to look at the basket, it's usually open and teemingwith things on which you'd rather not lay eyes。
別扔坑裏！中國的下水道可不是美國的下水道，它們沒法搞定廁紙的。儘量扔到後面的紙簍裏，不過記得，千萬別回頭看那個筐子！那些筐子永遠都是被塞滿了···那些用過的衛生紙···你懂得！別看！9. Finish Up.
9. 結束Out you go, you accomplished squat toilet ll your pants, wash your hands, if you can, and find yourfriends waiting for you outside。
用完廁所，你已經完成了作爲一個使用蹲廁的人的步驟。放下你的褲腿，洗乾淨手，然後找到在外面等你的朋友
