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托福独立写作如何给出合理观点避免扣分?立论点需躲开这2个雷区

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托福独立写作因为论点问题而扣分的情况并不少见。。下面小编就来重点解读两种托福独立写作中的论点扣分问题,一起来看。

托福独立写作如何给出合理观点避免扣分?立论点需躲开这2个雷区

 托福独立写作如何给出合理观点避免扣分?立论点需躲开这2个雷区

托福独立写作观点扣分情况分析

在托福考试的两篇作文要求中,综合写作因为其文章要求所以不存在观点方面的扣分,而独立写作由于需要更为完整的论述过程,因此对考生在提炼和展开文章论点方面就由较高要求了。考生在论点上出问题的情况主要有以下两类:

1. 观点太空泛无法写全写透

相信看过一些托福写作指导经验类资料的考生都会发现,指导经验中经常会要求大家尽量树立一些比较具体细节的观点来写,这其实很好理解,因为越具体能写的东西就越多。太过抽象空泛的观点想要写好,论述得言之有理是比较困难的,而且经常会出现论述不全面或是没有展开就结束的问题。考虑到托福写作的时间有限,观点树立得太空泛就相当于考生自己给自己挖坑,最后论述不到位缺乏说服力其实都是因为自己没有树立好观点。

举例来说,某篇作文的题目是关于移动电话对人类生活的影响。如果考生写出的是很宽泛的“移动电话对人类生活影响很大”,虽然之后看似可以写很多内容,但实际上是很容易写不到点子上的,因为能说的话太多大家反而不知道如何突出重点了。这种时候大家其实完全可以写移动电话对衣食住行中任意一点的影响。有了更为细节的内容,展开起来才会更加方便,考生也能根据自己的喜好给出更有说服力的论据,提升文章内容的质量。

另一篇作文的题目是广告带给社会的干扰。既然是干扰当然应该有具体内容。如果观点只是说广告会产生负面影响那也有观点太空泛的嫌疑,之后具体要展开同样会不太好写。大家可以收缩一下观点,比如从广告的误导性来具体展开,是不是脑子里一下子就多出了很多例子有很多话想说了?想要让文章内容更有干货,观点太过空泛是一定要避免的。

2. 论点太窄无法进一步展开

另一种比较常见的论点则与上面的情况正好相反,那就是论点太窄了。大家需要明白一点,一篇理想的高分独立写作文章,考生不仅需要有主论点,也需要有分论点,2-3个中间段其实就是让大家在主论点的基础上拓展出多个分论点然后分段论述的。如果考生的主论点就太过狭窄,那么后续拓展分论点就很难继续下去了,无话可写只能翻来覆去重复主要论点,文章的水准可想而知。

小编同样举个实例来说明论点太窄的危害性。比如某次考试的题目是讨论为什么有些人喜欢参加危险的极限运动。如果你直接给出的观点是极限运动能够放松自己缓解生活压力。那这个论点想要进一步展开的空间其实就很小了。但如果你把论点写得宽一点,比如极限运动能够带来很多益处,之后完全可以把缓解压力作为分论点来写,这样的论点既方便自己展开观点,也更容易找到各类论据进行论述支持。

总而言之,对一篇类似于托福独立写作要求的立论文来说,观点太空或是太窄都是大忌,会给自己后续的论述展开带来很多困难。小编希望大家通过上文内容学到正确的树立提出论点的写作思路,结合合理论述写好托福独立作文。

  善用媒体资源,提升托福写作能力

一、善用媒体资源三步走

第一步:脑中有题,心里不慌。

在搜集语料之前,各位考生务必花2个小时的时间熟悉一下近年来托福写作的机经真题,对考试的范围、题材等基本要素有所了解。这样做是为了有的放矢、节省时间。例如托福写作中基本不涉及政治、宗教等敏感话题,也很少出现生命科学、电子信息等具体的技术问题,因此考生在搜索语料时应该有一定的标准和明确的目标。

第二步:去粗取精,提炼精华。

网络上能够搜索到的媒体资源有很多,但并不是所有资源都可以利用、值得利用。文韬老师在此为各位考生确定两项原则:一是语言必须高大上,例如New York Times、USA Today、The Economist等。这些欧美国家主流媒体有良好的声誉,使用的语言优美、简练,且经过资深编审把关,值得信赖。二是选择有效信息。新闻、评论等文章一般呈现“倒金字塔”的机构,最重要的信息通常出现在开头部分,之后很可能旁征博引,叙述很多内容,因此考生务必明确一个主题,选择最重要、最有用的信息组织语料,用3-4句话把事情说清楚、说具体。

第三步:听说读写,全面提升。

一段好的语料可以从多个角度充分利用。例如在通读文章的过程中可以使用托福阅读的一些技巧,分清论点、论据、跳过修饰读主干、快速梳理句间逻辑等。阅读之后可以按照托福口语考试的要求进行复述,并针对一些现象给出简单的评价。还可以根据音频、视频资料锻炼听力能力,扩大词汇量。整理好的语料也可以提炼句型,进行仿写练习。

二、范文演练

接下来文韬老师带各位考生具体感受一下。例如我们点击USA TODAY官网,发现科技版头条新闻“Uber首席执行官表态降价要玩真的(Uber CEO is serious about keeping prices down)”,我们就可以按照阅读的规则技巧快速浏览,找出文章中有价值的信息。原文链接附上:

然后我们用3-4句话总结有用的信息,形成语料:

The CEO of the world biggest ridesharing service Uber Technologies, is serious about the company’s goal of keeping prices low for his customers. During the press conference, the CEO several times brought his arm down emphatically and pointed out that Uber wants to make the cost of its service cheaper than owning a car. To walk the line between capitalism and humanitarianism, Uber needs detailed data about the demand for its service. But always having a reliable ride is what he wants on Uber, and the sharing mode will be so reliable that every customer won’t have to schedule a ride in advance.

这样一段语料中包含了安全可靠、方便快捷、减少花费等丰富的信息,根据不同题目适当修改,就可以作为很好的例证来使用。如果我们在这段语料前面加上一句观点,做为统领例证的分论点,比如减少花费、安全可靠对人们出行是很重要的,那么就可以构造成一个完整的段落。此外,针对一些具体题目,我们也可以直接使用。例如在讨论商人是不是只看重金钱一题时,我们就可以用这个例子作为反驳的依据,像Uber这样成功的科技公司的CEO更看重客户的需求。

一般来说,考生只要用这种方法整理约20个不同题材的语料,就可以轻松搞定托福写作和口语中的“Independent Task”。当然,备考时间相对充裕的考生还可以从多个角度利用语料提升语言能力。例如针对托福口语考试,我们可以根据语料对Ridesharing这种现象进行复述和评价,也可以听关于Uber公司的音频积累科技、交通类的词汇等。

  托福写作中可以借鉴的连词

1. However

1)We thought the figures were correct. However, we have now discovered some errors.我们原以为这些数据正确,不过我们现在发现了一些错误。

2)However, he smothered, as best he was able, these feelings.然而,他尽其所能抑制住了这些感情。

3)If, however, you are an extrovert you are quite likely to enjoy it.然而,如果你是一个性格外向的人,你很可能会喜欢它。

4)It was, however, a little disappointing.不过,这有点儿令人失望。

2. Nonetheless

1) The book is too long but, nonetheless, informative and entertaining.这本书篇幅太长,但是很有知识性和趣味性。

2) The problems are not serious. Nonetheless, we shall need to tackle them soon.问题不严重, 不过我们还是需要尽快处理。

3) Nonetheless, it contains an element of truth.然而它也有些道理。

3. Nevertheless

1) He was very tired, nevertheless he kept working.他累得很,然而仍继续工作。

2) There is little chance that we will succeed in changing the law. Nevertheless, it is important that we try.我们几乎没有可能改变法律。不过,重要的是我们努力争取。

3) Nevertheless, they deserve notice and respect.然而,他们应该受到重视和尊敬。

4. By comparison

1) He was mortified by comparisons between his classmates’ good marks and his own.拿自己的成绩与同学们的优异成绩相比较他感到羞愧。

2) By comparison, expenditure on education increased last year.相比之下,去年教育经费增加了。

5. By contrast

1) By contrast, she was much more outspoken.对比起来,她坦率得多。

2) When you look at their new system, ours seems very old-fashioned by contrast.看看他们的新系统,我们的相比之下就显得太过时了。

6. Therefore

1) He is young and therefore easily pervertible.他年轻,因而容易变坏。

2) All sincere opinions should therefore be respected.因此一切诚恳的意见都应该收到尊重。

3) He is highly strung, and therefore, subject to heart attacks.他神经高度紧张,所以很容易发心脏病。

4) Therefore energy is now not a peripheral but a central issue in the economy.因此,能源在现时经济中并非枝节问题而是一个中心问题。

5) We have a growing population and therefore we need more and more food.我们的人口越来越多,因此我们需要越来越多的食物。

7. Hence

1) It’s handmade and hence expensive.这是手工制作的,因此价格很贵。

2) The computer has become smaller and cheaper and hence more available to a greater number of people.计算机已向小型低价的方向发展,从而使更多的人能够用上。

8. Thus

1) Life was thus made richer.生活因此变得更加丰富充实了。

2) We have failed. Thus we have to take the consequences.我们失败了。因此,我们只得承担后果。

3) We hope the new machine will work faster, thus reducing our costs.我们希望新机器将工作得更快,从而降低成本。

4) We’re able to do in-depth research and thus spot future trends.我们能作深度的研究,因而能看出来未来的趋向。

5) Old people often try to economize on heating, thus endangering their health.老年人常常想方设法节约暖气,结果损害了他们的健康。

6) The universities have expanded, thus allowing many more people the chance of higher education.大学扩招了,这样就使更多人能有机会接受高等教育。

7) A rise in incomes will create increased purchasing power, thus stimulating demand for goods and services.收入增加会提高购买力,从而刺激对商品及服务行业的需求。

8) We give money to charities, and thus salve our consciences.我们给慈善事业捐款,从而使自己的良心得到宽慰。

9. In view of

1) In view of the recent developments, we do not think this step advisable.考虑到最近事态的发展,我们认为这一步不可取。

2) Voluntary work was particularly important in view of the fact that women were often forced to give up paid work on marriage.考虑到妇女婚后常常被迫放弃有偿工作,志愿工作就尤为重要。

10. More often than not

1) Food is scarce and more often than not they go hungry.食物特别少,所以他们经常挨饿。

2) More often than not, his dog will try to bite his guests.他的狗经常会去咬客人。

11. On the one hand

1) On the one hand they’d love to have kids, but on the other, they don’t want to give up their freedom.一方面,他们想要孩子,但另一方面,他们又不想放弃自由自在的生活。

2) The firm was accommodating its customers on the one hand and making aggressive demands on the other.这家公司一方面尽量给顾客提供方便,另一方面则向他们大提要求。

12. For instance

1) What would you do, for instance, if you found a member of staff stealing?比如说,如果你发现有职员偷东西,你会怎么办?

2) It is a very nice town; it’s got very nice shops for instance.那是座非常好的城镇;例如,它有很好的商店。

3) Taking advertising for instance.以广告为例。

4) Let’s take Napoleon, for instance.以拿破仑为例。

5) Murder, petty theft and tax evasion, for instance, all have different motives and consequences.比如谋杀、小偷小摸和逃税,都有不同的动机和后果。

  托福写作范文:人们购买东西是出于虚荣而非需求,是否认同?

写作题目

Do you agree or disagree with the statement: People often buy products not because they really need them but because other people have them. 人们买一些东西并不是出于需求,而是因为其他人也拥有它们,是否认同?

写作范文

In recent decades, international trades and improving living standards have largely contributed to the large scale of purchase of products. The reason behind this commercial behaviors either comes from individual’s needs for them or from envy of those who have already possessed them. From my perspective, the essential motive behind the scene would be for individual purposes.

Admittedly, people would sometimes buy the products because friends or classmates have them. it is not rare to see that after a high school studens has bought a newly-released iPad and bring it to the class, other friends would be at first gathering around him to witness how the product runs and then beg their parents to buy the one for them. For them, buying the newest generation iPad might bring them attention from others, which has nothing to do with the functionality of product. However, on balance, this only happens for within a small number of people, especially young students and women. For other consumers, they would be wise in choosing what they want. In this regard, more people are buying products out of their needs.

To begin with, for college students, they are inclined to buy what they really want. In other words, due to limited living expenses monthly, most of them could not buy whatever they want. According to the recent survey conducted on Sina Weibo, after polling 500 students in universities from Beijing, most of them claim that each month they have to manage their living expenses within 1500 yuan. Not only does this sum of money have to cover meal bills, clothing and fees for textbooks, but it also have to deal with emergencies. Under this circumstance, normally they have to make a plan for money use, and try to avoid buying things with little practical use. This explains why college students in Beijing rarely buy the newest generation of iPhone or pay for monthly travel, and they have to put the money either on textbooks or living necessities.

In addition, male adults are another group of consumers who make purchase based on real needs. For example, for those who decide to buy a car, the motive is mostly because the car could help family member to tackle emergencies or drive them to the suburb for a relaxing weekend. Also, for those who decide to equip with a new Macbook, the motive might have something to do with work requirement, which asks them to process the data faster and more accurately. Moreover, for those who deicide to spend money on applying for MBA in business school, the motive might be related to career development. A wider caree insight cultivated from MBA would give them a broader window of success in the work. Seeing from this, it is the utilitarian purpose that makes male adults buy real products.

To sum up, although it is normal to see some customers making impulsive purchase since, most of the rational customers would buy products out of their needs.