英語版笑話
幽默和笑話有概念上的區別,笑話是滑稽言談本身,幽默在這裏則被作爲心智和性情層面上的概念來看待。下面是本站小編帶來的英語幽默小短文，歡迎閱讀!
Who's better stisfied? 誰更滿足?
A person with six children or a person with $6 million, who is better satisfied? Why? The person with six children of course. Because the one with $6 million wants more. 一個有六個孩子的人和一個有600萬美元的人，誰更滿足?爲什麼? 當然是有六個孩子的那個，因爲有600萬美元那個還想要得更多。
英語幽默小短文篇二How Did You Ever Get Here
How Did You Ever Get Here
One winter morning, an employee explained why he had shown up for work.45 minutes late. "It was so slippery out that for every step I took ahead, I slipped back two."
The boss eyed him suspiciously. "Oh, yeah? Then how did you ever get here?"
"I finally gave up," he said, "and started for home."
你是怎樣回來的?
一個冬天的早晨，一名僱員解釋他爲什麼遲到了四十五分鐘纔起來上班。“外面太滑了，我每向前邁一步，就要向後退兩步。”
老闆狐疑地看着他，“噢，是嗎?那你是怎樣到這裏來的?”
“後來我決定放棄，”他說，“然後我就往家裏走。”
英語幽默小短文篇三Charge for Bread and Butter
Charge for Bread and Butter
Some years ago, my dad, an attorney, took me to a fancy restaurant in Now York City. When the bill arrived, there was a $1.50 charge for bread and butter. Dad paid the bill, including the charge for bread and butter. However, the next day, he sent a letter to the resturant stating that the charge was uncalled for. Enclosed in the same envelope was a bill for $500 in legal services.
Someone from the restaurant called immediately and asked, "What is this $500 bill for? We never ordered any legal services."
Dad replied, "I never ordered any bread and butter."
The $1.50 was returned without delay.
麪包和黃油費
幾年前，我當律師的爸爸帶我去紐約的一家高檔餐館。帳單上來時，上面有1.5美元的麪包和黃油費。爸爸付了帳，連同麪包和黃油的收費一齊付了。但是第二天，他給餐館寄了一封信，說那項收費是沒有道理的，隨信還寄上了一張500美元的法律服務機構的收費單。
餐館馬上打來電話，問道：“這500美元的收費單是怎麼回事?我們從來沒有要什麼法律機構的服務。”
爸爸答道，“我也從來沒有要什麼麪包和黃油。”
那1.5美元立即就寄了回來。
英語幽默小短文篇四Plagiarism 抄襲
A friend of mine who teachs European history at Washington University in St. Louis tell about the time he spotted a plagiarized(剽竊，抄襲) term paper. He summoned(傳喚) the student to his office. "This isn't your work." he said. "Someone typed it for you straight out of the encyclopedia.
"You cann't prove that!" the student sputtered.
My friend smiled and show him the paper. Circled in red was: "Also see article on communism."
我有個朋友在聖路易斯的華盛頓大學教歐洲歷史，他說有一次他發現了一篇抄襲的學期論文。他把那個學生叫到了辦公室。“這不是你寫的，”他說，“有人幫你從百科全書上原封不動地打印了下來。”
“你沒有證據。”那學生氣急敗壞地說。
我朋友笑了，他把論文拿給他看。用紅筆圈出來的是：“也可參閱共產主義一文。”
英語幽默小短文篇五Perseverance is a virtue
Many years after receiving my graduate degree, I returned to the State University of New York at Binghamton as a faculty member. One day in a crowded elevator, someone remarked on itsinefficiency. I said the elevators had not changed in the 20 years since I began there as a student.
When the door finally opened, I felt a compassionate pat on my back, and turned to see an elderly nun smiling at me. "You'll get that degree, dear," she whispered. "Perseverance is avirtue."
獲取研究生學位多年以後，我回到位於賓翰頓的紐約州立大學當教員。一天，電梯裏很擁擠，有人抱怨電梯效率太低。我說自我在那裏當學生起，20年來電梯一直沒有換過。
最後當電梯門打開時，我感到有人在我的背上同情地拍了一下，回過頭來我看到一位年長的修女正在朝我微笑。“你會拿到學位的，親愛的，”她低聲說道：“堅持不懈是一種美德。”
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