增強自信的3種方法
Here's one of my favorite stories: when one of my friends was a little girl, her mom took her out for one of those special mother-daughter days. My friend looked around the room of the restaurant they were seated in and said, "Mom, that woman is acting beautiful, even though she isn't." If there was ever any doubt about it, our behavior really does influence the way others see us. A child might notice a discrepancy between confidence and physical beauty (they say the darndest things!), but an adult would likely take the behavior as fact. Because she herself was convinced of it, the woman in the restaurant was a knock out. Here are three ways to get such enviable confidence flowing yourself.
這是我最喜歡的故事之一：我一個朋友還很小的時候，她媽媽在一個特殊的母女日帶她出去。我的朋友環顧她們坐着的餐廳房間，然後說：“媽媽，那個女人儘管一點也不漂亮，也裝成很漂亮。”即使這是毫無疑問的，但是我們的行爲的確影響別人怎麼看待我們。小孩會注意到自信和人體美之間的差距，但一個大人會把這種行爲當成事實。因爲她自己也相信，餐廳裏的女人是個美女。下面是從你身上流露出這種令人羨慕的自信的3種方法。
Set yourself an achievable goal.
給自己定一個可實現的目標。
Confidence comes from competence (at least that's one of the places it comes from). Set yourself up for success with an achievable goal, like running a 5K or organizing your digital photos. Or give yourself several smaller goals, like cleaning out a junk drawer, or making it to the gym five times in one week. It doesn't matter what the goals are. What matters is the feeling of satisfaction that comes from setting out to do something, and then doing it. So what do you want to accomplish today, this week, this month?
自信來自能力（至少是其中一個方面）。爲自己的成功設定一個可實現的目標，例如跑5公里，或整理你的數碼照片。或者給自己定一些較小的目標，如清理裝廢品的抽屜，或一週去健身房鍛鍊5次。不管目標是什麼都沒關係。關鍵是設定目標做某事後，努力奮鬥的滿足感。所以，你今天，這個星期，這個月想要完成的事是什麼呢？
What does confidence look like?
自信是什麼樣子？
Picture the people who you think seem most confident. What is it about Michelle Obama, Susan Sarandon, and Phylicia Rashad (a few of my models)? Your confidence models don't even have to be real people. They could be characters in your favorite books, like Anne of Green Gables and Elizabeth Bennet (okay, a few more of personal faves). What is it about these women that so appeals to you? Notice the way they speak, the way they hold themselves, the way they sit. What are the outward trappings of confidence that you would like to have yourself? Pretend you're a scientist, and really study was confidence looks like.
拍下你認爲最自信的人的照片。米歇爾•奧巴馬，蘇珊•薩蘭登和菲利西亞•拉斯海德怎麼樣？你自信模仿對象不一定是現實中的人。他們可以是你喜歡書籍，像《綠山牆的安妮》和伊麗莎白這些人物。這些女性爲什麼那麼吸引你？注意她們說話，展現自己和坐的方式。你自己所要擁有的自信的外部標誌是什麼？假如你是一名科學家，那麼，自信的樣子就是真正地研究。
Fake it till you make it.
假裝自信達到目的
I used to have complicated feelings about this phrase. Who wants to fake confidence? We want to actually be confident. But strangely, faking it works. Whether "it" is confidence, romantic feelings towards your partner at the end of a bad day, wanting to go to the gym, or whatever, at some point you drop the act. You forget you're supposed to be acting confident and you just are. Think of it this way: It's like getting to the gym. You don't want to go, but to get yourself there, you pretend that you really can't wait to pound it out on the treadmill. Afterward, when you're glowing, happy, and filled with a sense of vitality and accomplishment, it doesn't matter whether you faked the motivation that got you there or not. The end result was the same, and you got to reap the benefits.
我過去對這個表達有着複雜的感覺。誰想假裝自信呢？我們想要的是真正的自信。但是很奇怪，假裝自信的確有用。無論是否自信，在你糟糕一天結束時對伴侶的浪漫感情，如想去健身房，等等，不然，在某種時候你會放棄這種行爲。你忘記你是假裝自信的，而實際上你是真正的自信。這樣想：很快就達到健身房了。你不想去，但是迫使自己去。你假裝真的等不及要在跑步機上連續跑步。當你過後容光煥發，快樂，充滿生氣和成就感後，就跟你是否假裝的動機沒有關係了。最終的結果是一樣的，而你從中獲益。
