你願意當吸血鬼還是殭屍？牛津這道入學試題該怎麼答？
想要入讀全球頂尖學府，你不光要有漂亮的成績單，還要有廣博的知識面和離奇的腦洞，比如，你得想好自己是願意當吸血鬼還是殭屍？如何測量自己的腦袋有多重？看完這些奇葩面試題，整個人都不好了……
Oxford University, one of the world's oldest and most sophisticated institutions of higher learning, has asked this question this year: Would you like to be a vampire or a zombie? The question was a surprise to many Britons, and the Times called it the most frightening test in the world, and the Guardian called it the most difficult.
世界最古老最頂尖的高等學府之一英國牛津大學今年出了一道這樣的考題：“你願意當吸血鬼還是殭屍？”此題讓很多英國人大跌眼鏡，《泰晤士報》稱之爲“世上最讓人驚恐的考試”，《衛報》說這是“最難”的考題。
Vampires and zombies are two strange creatures from Western folklore that have become the protagonists of fiction, movies and video games in recent years, and are increasingly known in popular culture around the world. The problem at All Souls College of the University of Oxford is also an old one. The performance of old traditional universities in keeping pace with the times.
吸血鬼和殭屍是西方民間傳說中的兩種異怪生物，近年來經常成爲小說、電影、電子遊戲中的主角，在流行文化中日漸爲全世界各地的人們所知，本次牛津大學萬靈學院的難題也來自這個古老傳說，不失爲歷史悠久的傳統大學與時俱進的表現。
那麼究竟是當吸血鬼好，還是做殭屍更強呢？兩者之間究竟該怎麼選？我們來看看英國各界的評論：
Martin Bellam, the Guardian's senior cultural correspondent, joked about the benefits of vampires: Have you ever seen an ugly vampire? It's not clear whether fashionistas are the only ones who become vampires or whether being a vampire makes you fashionable, but vampires look cool anyway. One of the drawbacks of being a vampire, he says, is that being immortal sounds fun, but it's not fun until you watch all your loved ones grow old and die in front of you. Of course, unless you make them all vampires, they can be with you forever and ever, and that puts a lot of pressure on you to choose who you want to establish such a permanent relationship with.
《衛報》文化事務高級記者馬丁·貝拉姆調侃吸血鬼的優勢：“你見過樣貌醜陋的吸血鬼嗎？不清楚到底是隻有時尚人士才變成吸血鬼呢還是當了吸血鬼就讓你很時尚，但總而言之，吸血鬼看着都很酷。”他還表示，吸血鬼當然也有不好之處，其中之一便是長生不老。聽着很好玩，但你要看着所有心愛的人都在你面前變老死去，你會發現這一點都不好玩。當然啦，除非你讓他們都變成吸血鬼，可以永永遠遠地陪着你。不過，這就意味着你要決定誰可以永久陪伴你，這個壓力有點大。
As for zombies, Bellam wrote: Vampires are solitary, but zombies are packed, so it's a better choice, and Zombies feed on their brains, which are completely delicious and healthy, an important Omega 3 fatty acid full of DHA. Of course, when zombies have the disadvantage of never being sexy and always emit a rotten, rotten meat smell, it's usually considered disgusting.
至於殭屍，貝拉姆是這樣寫的：吸血鬼都是獨來獨往，但殭屍卻是成羣結隊，因此這是一個更好的選擇，另外，殭屍以腦髓爲食，這是“完全美味，而且很健康，是富含DHA的Omega3脂肪酸。”當然，當殭屍的壞處除了永遠無法有性感的樣子，還有身上總是散發出一種腐朽的爛肉味，讓人噁心。
其實，今年牛津大學萬靈學院的考題不止這一個，其他題要答得好也不容易。你們感受一下：
Does Google know us better than ourselves?
“谷歌比我們更瞭解自己嗎？”
No one can play Shakespeare?
“莎士比亞無人企及，便沒人能演嗎？”
Should sugar be taxed?
“糖是不是該徵稅？”
There are also more traditional questions such as "Does music stop suddenly at Brahms" and the annual ethical question "Is all life valuable"?
此外還有一些比較傳統的問題如“勃拉姆斯之後再無音樂嗎？”以及年年都有的倫理問題“所有的生命都有價值嗎？”
The College of All Souls itself is remarkable. Unlike other colleges, the College of All Souls does not admit undergraduates. People who pass the exam automatically become academicians of the College, and the exam is unusually well-known. It's called the most difficult test.
萬靈學院本身就非常不同凡響，與其他學院不同，這所學院並不招收本科生，通過考試的人自動成爲學院的院士，而這一考試之不同尋常素來有名，被稱爲最難的考試。
But in fact, good grades are not enough, even if you want to get into Oxford and Cambridge. Both universities have an interview, and often ask weird questions that don't have the right answers to test students' intellectual and ideological sensitivity. Many exceptionally good students often fail.
但實際上，想成功考入牛津和劍橋大學，光有好成績也是不夠的。這兩所大學都有面試一關，經常問一些沒有正確答案的“稀奇古怪”的問題考驗學生的知識面和思想靈敏度，很多成績異常優秀的學生往往過不了這一關。
再來看看牛津大學和劍橋大學以往的一些面試題，檢驗一下自己的腦回路吧。
Does the incubator think? Are snail conscious? (Oxford Experimental Psychology)
保溫箱會思考嗎？蝸牛有意識嗎？（牛津-實驗心理學）
This is a bark. Please say something about it. (Oxford - Bioscience)
這是一塊樹皮，請就它說點什麼。（牛津-生物科學）
If God is omnipotent, can he create a stone that he can not lift? (Oxford - Ancient Greek and ancient Rome)
如果神無所不能，他是否能夠創造出一塊他舉不動的石頭？（牛津-古希臘古羅馬學）
Do you want to be a novel or a poem? (Oxford - English)
你更想成爲一部小說還是一首詩？（牛津-英文）
How do you measure the weight of your head? (Cambridge - Medical)
你如何測量自己頭部的重量？（劍橋-醫學）
Is the husband's habit of smearing lemonade on his eggs at breakfast enough to justify divorce if his wife has repeatedly expressed her disgust? (Cambridge - Law)
丈夫吃早餐時有在雞蛋上塗檸檬醬的習慣，如果妻子已經多次對此表示厭惡，這個習慣是否足以成爲離婚的理由？（劍橋-法學）
Is the chair in front of you really there? (Cambridge - Philosophy)
眼前的椅子真的在那裏嗎？
