超暖心：現實生活中的超級英雄們
Use the internet often enough and you'll soon start to think that the world full of villains. But there are plenty of heroes who are there to protect you from them. And not all of them wear capes. Some are wearing bear costumes while they tear apart tents of Black Friday campers. Others are rocking a baseball cap when they're saving beer from a burning house. Bored Panda has compiled a list of our saviors, and their bravery is worth all the attention it can get. Yes, they might not be fighting the Joker or Magneto, but their courageous acts are making the world a better place nonetheless. And are putting a smile on our faces in the process. Scroll down to meet the heroes and upvote your favorites!
在互聯網上混跡的時間夠久，你就會開始覺得，世界上到處都是壞人。幸好，世界上還有很多的英雄能保護你不受壞人傷害。並不是所有英雄都披風。還有些穿着熊熊套裝，有些隻身赴險，從火災裏救出了一杯啤酒。我們整理了一組英雄照，他們的英勇壯舉值得得到大家的關注。或許他們並不會打擊小丑或萬磁王，但他們仍勇於用實際行動讓世界變得更好。並且在這個過程中，讓我們不禁會心一笑。往下翻，和這些英雄見見面，爲你最喜歡的英雄投個票吧！
1 The Hero We Deserve
我們值得擁有的英雄
My essay is 642 words and I need 700.
我的論文只有642個字，要求要700字。
Change the text color to white and WISJDLSJZOEKOQNDOEWKO away at your keyboard.
在鍵盤上隨便敲幾個字，再把字體改成白色。
2 The Hero We Need
我們需要這樣的英雄
Troopers : Man on LDS saves dog from imaginary fire.
傘兵報道：男子服致幻藥，從自己想象的火災中救了一隻小狗
His heart was in the right place even though his serotonin levels probably weren't...
他的心如此正直，不過他體內的藥物含量可能有點不對勁
3 Not All Heroes Wear Capes
不是所有英雄都披着披風
What kind of monsters throw away a plant!
居然把一株植物丟進垃圾桶，真是禽獸！
You’re safe now, little guy.
你安全了，小傢伙！
His name is Stanley and we are best friends.
我給他取名叫Stanley，我們是最好的朋友。
Picked Stanley a new home.
給Stanley找了個新家。
I rescued 2 plants! Stanley is on the right and Stacy is on the left.
我救了兩株植物！Stanley在左邊，Stacy在右邊。
There new home.
看，新家！
4 Guy On The Train
火車上遇到的人
The guy next to me on the train was watching the office, so naturally I not so subtly watched along. He noticed me watching with hime and turned on the subtitles . I hope he knows that I would die for him.
火車上坐在我旁邊的男人正在看《辦公室》，我理所應當的，幾乎是明目張膽的跟着一起看起來。他發現我跟着一起看，就把字幕打開了。我想讓他知道我可以爲他而死。
Hello, sir, if you see this. I will care for your children if you’re ever met with sudden death. You are also invited to my wedding and inscribed in my will.
嗨，先生，如果你看到這個消息，如果你遇到意外，我願意照顧你的子女。我也想邀請你參加我的婚禮。我的遺囑裏也會有你的名字。
5 Not All Heroes Wear Capes, Some Wear Booty Shorts
不是所有英雄都披着披風，有些英雄穿着短褲。
My friend needed sweatpants in order to go in her lab and take a quize so I'm chilling in[ the restroom for 50 mins with my booty shorts on.
/en]我的一個朋友要在她的實驗室裏參加一個考試，可是她沒穿長褲。我把長褲借給了她，自己在衛生間裏站了50分鐘。
[en]6 Cereal Problem
麥片危機
Can I borrow some milk from one of you?
你們誰能借我一點牛奶？
It’s 1:44am.
現在是凌晨1點44分。
Why do you need milk?
你要牛奶幹嘛？
Adryan how much do you need?
Adryan你需要多少？
I put cereal on the bowl and there was no milk.
我把麥片放在碗裏，突然發現家裏沒麥片了。
Like a whole gallon?
大概一加侖嗎？
Deadass if you come to the window I sneak out of.
笨笨，我從窗戶溜出去，你到窗口來。
I’ll give you milk.
我給你牛奶。
You’re mad, dumb Adryan.
你是個瘋子，傻Adryan。
I’m leaving in 5 minutes.
我五分鐘之內出發。
7 Not All Heroes Wear Capes
不是所有英雄都披着披風
Sometimes, When No One Buys Tickets For A Movie, My Boss Lets Me Play GTA V On The Big Screen During My Break
我在電影院工作，如果某個場次的票沒人買，我的老闆就會讓我在休息時間在大熒幕上玩電子遊戲（《俠盜獵車5》）
8.Friend Of Mine Posted This To Facebook. This Guy Goes Around The Neighborhood Selling BBQ Like An Ice-Cream Truck Guy On The Weekends
我的一個朋友在社交網上發佈了這張照片。這個大叔一到週末就會在小區裏到處賣燒烤，就好像冰淇淋車司機一樣。
9.I've carried chalk in my car for 10 months just so I could do this once. Yesterday was the day.
10個月來我一直在車裏放着一根粉筆，就是爲了某天有機會這樣做。昨天終於做啦。
10.Today I Am The Airport Hero.
今天我是機場英雄！
11.My Professor Showed Up To Our 7:30 Am Final In His Pajamas To Protest Having Finals That Early.
我們的教授出現在早上7點半舉行的期末考考場，穿着他的睡衣，爲的是抗議把期末考試安排得這麼早。
（翻譯：小木）
