經典科幻文學:《宇宙盡頭的餐館》第21章1
Chapter 21
Down on the dry, red world of Kakrafoon, in the middle of the vast Rudlit Desert, the stage technicians were testing the sound system.
That is to say, the sound system was in the desert, not the stage technicians. They had retreated to the safety of Disaster Area’s giant control ship which hung in orbit some four hundred miles above the surface of the planet, and they were testing the sound system from there. Anyone within five miles of the speaker silos wouldn’t have survived the tuning up.
If Arthur Dent had been within five miles of the speaker silos then his expiring thought would have been that in both size and shape the sound rig closely resembled Manhattan. Risen out of the silos, the neutron phase speaker stacks towered monstrously against the sky, obscuring the banks of plutonium reactors and seismic amps behind them.
Buried deep in concrete bunkers beneath the city of speakers lay the instruments that the musicians would control from their ship, the massive photon-ajuitar, the bass detonator and the Megabang drum complex.
It was going to be a noisy show.
Aboard the giant control ship, all was activity and bustle. Hotblack Desiato’s limoship, a mere tadpole beside it, had arrived and docked, and the lamented gentleman was being transported down the high vaulted corridors to meet the medium who was going to interpret his psychic impulses on to the ajuitar keyboard.
A doctor, a logician and a marine biologist had also just arrived, flown in at phenomenal expense from Maximegalon to try to reason with the lead singer who had locked himself in the bathroom with a bottle of pills and was refusing to come out till it could be proved conclusively to him that he wasn’t a fish. The bass player was busy machine-gunning his bedroom and the drummer was nowhere on board.
Frantic inquiries led to the discovery that he was standing on a beach on Santraginus V over a hundred light years away where, he claimed, he had been happy over half an hour now and had found a small stone that would be his friend.
The band’s manager was profoundly relieved. It meant that for the seventeenth time on this tour the drums would be played by a robot and that therefore the timing of the cymbalistics would be right.
The sub-ether was buzzing with the communications of the stage technicians testing the speaker channels, and this it was that was being relayed to the interior of the black ship.
Its dazed occupants lay against the back wall of the cabin, and listened to the voices on the monitor speakers.
“OK, channel nine on power,” said a voice, “testing channel fifteen…”
Another thumping crack of noise walloped through the ship.
“Channel fifteen AOK,” said another voice.
A third voice cut in.
“The black stunt ship is now in position,” it said, “it’s looking good. Gonna be a great sundive. Stage computer on line?”
A computer voice answered.
“On line,” it said.
“Take control of the black ship.”
“Black ship locked into trajectory programme, on standby.”
“Testing channel twenty.”
第二十一章
在卡庫拉馮乾燥的紅色世界裏，路德利特大沙漠的中部，舞臺技術人員正在測試音響系統。
這是說，只有音響系統在沙漠裏，而不是那些技術人員。他們已經撤退到了安全地區——“災難地帶”樂隊的巨型控制飛船停留在這顆行星表面上空差不多四百英里高的軌道上。他們從那裏測試音效。距離揚聲器發射井五英里之內的任何人，都不可能倖存下來完成調音工作。
如果阿瑟·鄧特處在距離揚聲器發射井五英里之內的區域內，臨死之前，他將意識到，這些音響設備無論在規模還是形狀上，都與曼啥頓極其相似。中於相位揚聲器組羣從這些發射井裏伸出來，像可怕的巨獸，矗立在天空下，遮住了成排的鈈反應堆，以及它們後面的地震級電吉他。
深埋在這座揚聲器城市下面的混凝土碉堡裏的是樂手們能夠從龜船上加以控制的樂器，光子吉他、重低音雷管，還有超巨響組合鼓。
這將是一場響亮喧囂的演出。
巨型控制飛船上，一切都顯得活躍而匆忙。霍特布萊克，迪西亞託的豪華飛船停靠在對接塢上，跟這艘巨型飛船相比，活像一隻蝌蚪。這位已逝的先生被人從高高的拱形廊道上轉移下來，以便和媒介器連接，媒介器將把他的精神衝動傳遞到電吉他的鍵盤上，
一位醫生、一位邏輯學家和一位海洋生物學家也剛剮抵達，他們花費了顯然非常昂貴的成本從馬克希姆佳倫飛過來，希望能和樂隊的主唱進行溝通。後者把自己鎖在衛生間裏，拿着一瓶藥片，宣稱他拒絕出來，除非有人能向他確切地證明他不是一條魚。樂隊的鯫斯手正在用機槍掃射他的臥室，而鼓手則根本不在船上。
經過一番瘋狂的調查，終於發現他正站在一百光年以外的桑特拉金斯5號星的一片沙灘上，在那裏，他宣稱自己已經快樂地度過了超過半小時的時光，並且已經找到了一塊將成爲他的朋友的小石頭。
樂隊的經理由衷地鬆了一口氣，因爲這意味着，在這次巡迴演出期間，這些鼓將第十七次由一個機器人來演奏，兇此，鼓點節拍將掌握得恰到好處。
亞以太嗡嗡作響，傳遞着測試揚聲器各頻道的舞臺技術人員彼此之間交流的信息。傳人那艘黑色飛船內部的正是這種信息。
在它裏面，那幾個被震得頭暈眼花的乘客靠在黑色艙壁上，聽到了監聽揚聲器裏傳來的聲音。
“好的，九頻道啓動，”一個聲音說，“現在測試十五頻道”
又一聲雷鳴般的巨響碾過飛船。
“十五頻道A，OK。”另一個聲音說。
第一個聲音捕了進來；
“黑色特技飛船已經就位，”這聲音說，“看上去狀態不錯。這次太陽俯衝肯定壯觀極了。舞臺電腦在線上嗎‘”
一個電腦的聲音回答了他。
“在線上。”它說。
“接管黑色飛船。”
“黑色飛船已經鎖定軌跡程序，隨時待命。”
“換二十頻道。”
