異地戀想長久？你必須想清楚這2點大綱
1. Why Do People Do Long-Distance?
1.人們爲什麼異地戀？
Rarely do people ever get themselves into long-distance relationships on purpose. Typically, what ends up happening is that couples become victim of circumstance. Another way that long-distance relationships get facilitated is when one person ends up spending a lot of time in a different state or city for either work or leisure, and forms a connection with someone there. However, there are cases where both parties know that distance will be a factor they have to deal with before starting the relationship.
很少有人特意要開始異地戀，比較典型的原因是情侶受情況所迫，另外一個導致異地戀的原因是一個人因工作需要或休閒在其他州或城市待的時間比較長，與當地人發展了戀情。然而還有一些是雙方在開始戀愛之前就清楚距離將是他們要面臨的一個問題。
As for how these situations differ in the way these relationships are carried out, it has to do with how long the distance is set to last.
不同的異地戀情況與異地戀情要持續多久有關。
What Real Women Say: "We met on a dating site, " says Eileen, 41. "He was from Maine, an eight hour car ride away. We only lasted a year the first time. The distance was too much and too expensive to maintain. About a year and a half later we tried it again. This time we were more conscious of what's involved. Staying consistent helps. Have dates over the phone, watching the same movie together. See each other as often as you can. Surprising each other with a card or something in the mail or flowers at work is a great way to keep the romance."
異地戀女性親身體會：41歲的Eileen說：“我們是在交友網站上認識的，他來自緬因州，開車要走8個小時。第一次我們的戀情只持續了1年，距離太遠，戀愛成本太高。大約1年半以後我們複合了，這一次我們更清楚要面對什麼。步調一致對戀愛很有幫助，可以通過電話約會，一起看同一部電影，儘可能多見面。給對方驚喜也是保持浪漫的好方法，比如送卡片、郵東西或工作時送花。”
2. Can Your Relationship Handle Long-Distance?
2.你們能承受異地戀嗎？
Long-distance relationships have a shelf life, and the key factor that makes this type of arrangement work is having an end goal or date in mind when it will be possible for the two of you to be in the same place together. "Long-distance relationships were meant to be temporary," says Darné. Another factor that has a tremendous impact on whether or not a relationship will be able to handle long distance is the maturity of both parties involved. You also have to be strong enough to resist temptation, which is typically more difficult that people think, and have tremendous trust in your partner.
異地戀有保質期，實現異地戀的關鍵在於心裏要有一個你們最終能團聚的終極目標或期限. Darné說：“異地戀應該是暫時的。”另外一個影響異地戀能否持久的因素就是雙方有多成熟。你也要足夠堅強能抵抗誘惑，這顯然比人們想的要難，而且你對對方要有絕對的信任。
What Real Women Say: "In the beginning, the hardest part was just missing each other," says Helena, 31. "As time went on, what became hard for me was him making new friends and becoming a part of a new clique that I didn't quite fit into. If you're going to try long distance, know that your relationship is going to change. Hopefully you'll be able to evolve together instead of letting the distance push you apart. "
異地戀女性親身體會：31歲的Helena說：“一開始最難的是彼此思念，後來對我來說很難接受的是他交了新朋友並且有了新的交際圈，而我融入不進去。如果你要嘗試異地戀，你要知道你們的關係會發生變化，但你們也有希望能共同克服，而不是被距離拆散。”
