不要再對單身人士說這些話了大綱
Stop saying this to single people
不要再對單身人士說這些話了
"How are you still single?"
“你怎麼還是單身啊？”
This question is often meant as a compliment when you can't understand why your attractive, smart, and funny friend hasn't found someone yet. But it also implies that no normal person should still be single after all this time. And it forces single people to justify why they are not in relationships.
當你十分不理解你那風趣、聰慧、有魅力的朋友爲何還沒找到另一半時，這通常是一句恭維話。但這也意味着，正常人不應該一直單着。同時，這會迫使單身人士爲他們不談戀愛的行爲做出辯解。
"You're too picky."
“你太挑了。”
This backward message implies that single people should ignore their standards just for the sake of being in a relationship. It's better to be picky than to settle. And there is nothing wrong with having high standards when it comes to finding a partner. So don't tell single people otherwise.
從反向角度而言，這句話意味着：爲了談戀愛，單身人士應該忽略自己的求偶標準。挑剔總好過將就。而且，以高標準尋找另一半又何錯之有呢？所以，不要再對單身人士說這句話了。
"Are you dating anyone?"
“你在約會嗎？”
This question is irritating to single people, especially if you haven't seen them in a while. If they are dating someone worth mentioning, they will tell you. Otherwise, they don't want to talk about their relationship status or lack of a relationship. So ask them how they are doing instead.
對單身人士而言，這個問題令人惱火，尤其是在你很長時間未見到他/她的情況下。如果有值得一提的約會對象，他們會告訴你的。如若不然，則意味着他們不想談論自己的感情狀態。所以，不如問問他們近況如何吧。
"I know someone who is also single. Want me to set you up?"
“我也有單身的朋友，要不要給你們牽線搭橋？”
Only set up single people on dates if they ask you to, and only with people who will be a good match. If being single is the only thing they have in common, then don't bother. Otherwise, offering to set up someone means you assume they want to be set up, which is not always the case. When talking to single people, don't treat them like they need to be saved from their single life.
只有當單身人士請你當紅孃的時候，你才應該給他們安排，而且應安排對方看得上的人。如果單身是他們的唯一共同點，那就別操心了。否則，主動給某人牽線意味着你覺得他倆很配，但通常情況下，事實並非如此。和單身人士聊天時，不要一廂情願地認爲，他們需要你將其從單身生活中解救出來。
"There's plenty of fish in the sea."
“天涯何處無芳草。”
This cliché is very popular when it comes to giving "advice" to singles. Even if there are many eligible people your single friend could date, maybe they are having trouble meeting someone they connect with right now. So this saying is not helpful.
一談到給單身人士提“建議”，人們通常都會將這句陳詞濫調掛在嘴邊。即便有很多符合條件的人值得你的這位單身朋友相約，但也許他/她現在有約會對象，只不過遇到問題了呢？所以，這句話並沒有多大作用。
"Don't worry, you'll find the right person eventually."
“別擔心，你會找到那個人的。”
Maybe they will find the right person and maybe they won't. But when people say this to singles, they assume singles are stressed about being single. While it may be the truth for some, it isn't for all.
也許他們會找到那個人，也許不會。但當你對單身人士說這句話時，你潛意識地認爲他/她因爲找不到對象而倍感壓力。雖然有些人的確爲此感到焦慮，但也不能以偏概全啊！
