狄更斯雙語小說:《董貝父子》第48章Part4

'Well, I m pretty well, thank'ee, Captain Gills,' said Mr Toots. 'You know I'm never quite what I could wish to be, now. I don't expect that I ever shall be any more.'
Mr Toots never approached any nearer than this to the great theme of his life, when in conversation with Captain Cuttle, on account of the agreement between them.
'Captain Gills,' said Mr Toots, 'if I could have the pleasure of a word with you, it's - it's rather particular.'
'Why, you see, my lad,' replied the Captain, leading the way into the parlour, 'I ain't what you may call exactly free this morning; and therefore if you can clap on a bit, I should take it kindly.'
'Certainly, Captain Gills,' replied Mr Toots, who seldom had any notion of the Captain's meaning. 'To clap on, is exactly what I could wish to do. Naturally.'
'If so be, my lad,' returned the Captain. 'Do it!'
The Captain was so impressed by the possession of his tremendous secret - by the fact of Miss Dombey being at that moment under his roof, while the innocent and unconscious Toots sat opposite to him - that a perspiration broke out on his forehead, and he found it impossible, while slowly drying the same, glazed hat in hand, to keep his eyes off Mr Toots's face. Mr Toots, who himself appeared to have some secret reasons for being in a nervous state, was so unspeakably disconcerted by the Captain's stare, that after looking at him vacantly for some time in silence, and shifting uneasily on his chair, he said:
'I beg your pardon, Captain Gills, but you don't happen to see anything particular in me, do you?'
'No, my lad,' returned the Captain. 'No.'
'Because you know,' said Mr Toots with a chuckle, 'I kNOW I'm wasting away. You needn't at all mind alluding to that. I - I should like it. Burgess and Co. have altered my measure, I'm in that state of thinness. It's a gratification to me. I - I'm glad of it. I - I'd a great deal rather go into a decline, if I could. I'm a mere brute you know, grazing upon the surface of the earth, Captain Gills.'
The more Mr Toots went on in this way, the more the Captain was weighed down by his secret, and stared at him. What with this cause of uneasiness, and his desire to get rid of Mr Toots, the Captain was in such a scared and strange condition, indeed, that if he had been in conversation with a ghost, he could hardly have evinced greater discomposure.
'But I was going to say, Captain Gills,' said Mr Toots. 'Happening to be this way early this morning - to tell you the truth, I was coming to breakfast with you. As to sleep, you know, I never sleep now. I might be a Watchman, except that I don't get any pay, and he's got nothing on his mind.'
'Carry on, my lad!' said the Captain, in an admonitory voice.
'Certainly, Captain Gills,' said Mr Toots. 'Perfectly true! Happening to be this way early this morning (an hour or so ago), and finding the door shut - '
'What! were you waiting there, brother?' demanded the Captain.
'Not at all, Captain Gills,' returned Mr Toots. 'I didn't stop a moment. I thought you were out. But the person said - by the bye, you don't keep a dog, you, Captain Gills?'
The Captain shook his head.

“唔，我很好，謝謝您，吉爾斯船長，”圖茨先生說道，”您知道，我從沒有像現在感覺得這麼好，這正是我所希望的。我也不指望今後什麼時候還能會這樣好的了。”
圖茨先生跟卡特爾船長談話的時候，從來沒有像現在這樣明白地暗示過他生活中的這個重要的話題，因爲他遵守他們之間達成的協議。
“吉爾斯船長，”圖茨先生說道，”如果我能榮幸地跟您談一句話的話，這是--這是一件重要的事情。”
“啊，您聽我說，我的孩子，”船長回答道，一邊把他領到客廳裏，”今天早上我不很空；所以您如果能急忙張帆的話，那麼我將會十分感謝。”
“當然，吉爾斯船長，”圖茨先生回答道，他不太明白船長話中的含意。”急忙張帆，這正是我希望要做的事情。這是很自然的。”
“如果是這樣的話，我的孩子，”船長回答道，”那就請這麼做吧。”
船長由於保守着那極大的祕密--董貝小姐這時候就在他的家裏，而天真的圖茨先生則坐在他的對面，對這一無所知--，心神十分不定，額上都冒出了一顆汗珠。當他手裏拿着上了光的帽子，慢條斯理地把它擦乾的時候，他覺得他不能把眼睛從圖茨先生的臉上移開。看來，圖茨先生本人也有一些祕密的理由使他感到緊張不安；船長的凝視使他心煩意亂；他默默地、發呆地向他看了一些時候，很不自在地在椅子上移來移去，然後說道：
“請原諒，吉爾斯船長，您沒有看到我有什麼特殊的地方吧，是不是？”
“沒有，我的孩子，”船長回答道，”沒有。”
“因爲您知道，”圖茨先生吃吃地笑了一下，說道，”我知道我瘦了。您絲毫不必顧慮，指出這一點好了。我--我喜歡這樣。我瘦得這個樣子，伯吉斯公司已經重新量了我的尺寸。我感到滿意。我--我喜歡這樣。如果我能做得到的話，那麼我真十分願意衰弱下去。您知道，我只不過是一頭在地面上吃草的畜牲罷了。吉爾斯船長。”
圖茨先生愈是這樣滔滔不絕地說下去，船長被他自己的祕密壓得愈是難受，也就愈是凝神地注視着他。由於存在這樣一個使他感到不安的原因，又由於他一心想擺脫掉圖茨先生，所以他當時處在十分惶恐與奇怪的狀態中；如果他是在跟一個鬼怪交談的話，那麼他也未必會露出更爲心緒不寧的神色的。
“可是我現在想跟您談一下，吉爾斯船長，”圖茨先生說道，”今天早上我正好往這裏走過來，--說老實話吧，我想來跟您一道吃早飯。至於睡覺，您知道，我現在完全不睡覺了。我可以說跟一位更夫一樣，所不同的是，沒有人給我發工資，更夫也沒有什麼沉重的心事。”
“說下去，我的孩子！”船長用警告的語氣說道。
“當然，吉爾斯船長，”圖茨先生說道。”完全正確！今天早上我正好往這裏走過來（大概在一個小時以前），發現門關着--”
“怎麼！是?您在門口等候着呀，老弟？”船長問道。
“完全不是，吉爾斯船長，”圖茨先生回答道。”我片刻也沒有停留。我以爲您出去了。可是那人說--順便問一下，您家裏沒有養狗吧，?是?不?是，吉爾斯船長？”
船長搖搖頭。