諾貝爾文學經典:《寵兒》第1章Part 25
"Seth — thuh.""Ma'am.""Hold on to the baby.""Yes, Ma'am.""Seth — thuh.""Ma'am.""Get some kindlin in here.""Yes, Ma'am."
Oh but when they sang. And oh but when they danced and sometimes they danced the men as well as the ma'ams, one of whom was certainly her own. They shifted shapes andbecame something other. Some unchained, demanding other whose feet knew her pulse better thanshe did. Just like this one in her stomach. "I believe this baby's ma'am is gonna die in wild onionson the bloody side of the Ohio River." That's what was on her mind and what she told Denver. Herexact words. And it didn't seem such a bad idea, all in all, in view of the step she would not have totake, but the thought of herself stretched out dead while the little antelope lived on — an hour? aday? a day and a night? — in her lifeless body grieved her so she made the groan that made theperson walking on a path not ten yards away halt and stand right still. Sethe had not heard thewalking, but suddenly she heard the standing still and then she smelled the hair. The voice, saying,"Who's in there?" was all she needed to know that she was aboutto be discovered by a white boy.
That he too had mossy teeth, an appetite. That on a ridge of pine near the Ohio River, trying to getto her three children, one of whom was starving for the food she carried; that after her husband haddisappeared; that after her milk had been stolen, her back pulped, her children orphaned, she wasnot to have an easeful death. No. She told Denver that a something came up out of the earth intoher — like a freezing, but moving too, like jaws inside. "Look like I was just cold jaws grinding,"she said. Suddenly she was eager for his eyes, to bite into them; to gnaw his cheek.
“塞———絲哎。”“太太。”“看住寶寶。”“是，太太。”“塞———絲哎。”“太太。”“弄點兒柴火過來。”“是，太太。”
噢，可是當他們唱起歌。噢，可是當她們跳起舞。有時他們跳的是羚羊舞。男人們和太太們一齊跳，太太中有一個肯定是她自己的太太。他們變換姿勢裝成別的什麼，別的不戴鎖鏈、有所要求的什麼，它們的腳比她自己更瞭解她的脈搏。就像她肚子裏的這一個。“我相信這孩子的太太將會在俄亥俄河血腥的岸上、在野蔥中間一命嗚呼。”那就是她當時的想法和後來告訴丹芙的話。她的原話。說實在的，若是不用再多走一步了，那倒也算不上太糟糕；可是想到她自己撒手死去，而小羚羊卻活在她沒有生命的軀體裏———一個小時？一天？一天一夜？———她悲痛得呻吟起來，使不到十碼外的小道上一個趕路的人停下了腳步，站住不動。塞絲一直沒有聽到有人走路，卻突然間聽到了站住的聲音，然後聞見了頭髮的味道。她一聽見那個說着“誰在那兒？”的聲音，就知道她將要被一個白人小子發現了。
就是說，他也有着生了青苔的牙齒，有着好胃口。就是說，當她追尋着她的三個孩子，而其中一個還渴望着她身上的奶水的時候；就是說，在她的丈夫失蹤不久；就是說，在她的奶水被搶走、後背被搗了個稀爛、孩子們變成孤兒之後，在俄亥俄河附近的一座松嶺上，她將不得好死。不。她告訴丹芙，有個鬼東西從地底下冒了出來，鑽進她的身體———似乎要把她凍結，但仍能讓她動彈，就如同在裏面留了一具顎骨。“好像我整個就是一副冷冷的顎骨，在那裏咬牙切齒。”她說道。突然間她渴望他的眼睛，想把它們咬碎；然後再去啃他的臉。
