不要輕易撩蘋果的Siri，因爲會把你笑瘋大綱
Virtual personal assistants are getting smarter, but they might also be getting more sarcastic. The Internet went wild earlier this week when they discovered how Siri, the Apple iPhone and ipads' virtual assistant, responds to the question, "What is 0 ÷ 0?". For those that missed it, the reply was:
虛擬個人助手變得越來越智能了，不過她們也可能變得越來越嘴毒。就在這個星期，網友們都爲蘋果手機的虛擬個人助理，siri炸了鍋，因爲有一個網友問了siri一個問題，“0÷0=？”如果你錯過了這個梗，下面公佈siri給出的答案：
"Imagine that you have zero cookies and you split them evenly among zero friends. How many cookies does each person get? See? It doesn't make sense. And Cookie Monster is sad that there are no cookies. And you are sad that you have no friends."
“想象一下，你有0塊甜餅，你跟自己的0個朋友分享這些甜餅，每個朋友能分到多少塊甜餅呢？你看，這個問題沒有道理。而且甜餅怪會 因爲你沒有甜餅而傷心，你也會因爲自己沒有朋友而傷心。”
Business Insider has collected some of the best Siri responses to date in their list, which we've published below. Have you found some funny Siri responses? Vote on your favorite, or post your own!
Business Insider收集了一組起勁爲止網友發現的最經典的siri語錄，我們展示在下文。你在生活中聽到過siri說的有趣的話嗎？爲你最喜歡的一則投票，或者上傳你的原創吧！
ana, get me today’s movie times.
小娜，請你幫我查查今天的電影時間表
Who’s Cortana?
小娜是誰？
Oops I mean Siri
對不起，我是說siri。
Who is Cortana?
小娜到底是誰?
Please get me the movie times
請給我看今天的電影時間表。
Maybe you should ask Cortana for the movie times
或許你應該讓你的小娜幫你查電影時間表。
do you have a boyfriend?
你有男朋友嗎？
Why? So we can get ice-cream together, and listen to music, and travel across galaxies, only to have it end in slammed doors, heartbreak and loneliness? Sure, where do I sign up?
爲什麼要有男朋友？就爲了一起吃冰淇淋，一起聽音樂，飛躍星海，最後吵架摔門，心碎，以孤獨收場嗎？聽上去真不錯，那麼……在哪裏才能買得到呢？
cell phone is the best?
什麼牌子的手機最好？
Wait…there ar eother phones？
什麼？還有其他牌子的手機？
does the fox say?
狐狸怎麼叫？
Fraka-kaka-kaka-kaka-kow
弗拉卡、卡卡卡、卡卡卡猴！
, what is inception about?
Siri,《盜夢空間》這部電影講的是什麼？
Inception is about dreaming about dreaming about dreaming about dreaming about something or other. I fell asleep.
《盜夢空間》講的是有人夢到自己在做夢，在這個夢裏自己又在做夢，在這個夢裏的夢裏自己還是在做夢，在這個夢裏的夢裏的夢裏他仍舊在做夢，在這個夢中的夢中的夢中的夢裏他在做某件事。我已經睡着了。
, I’m sad.
Siri，我很悲傷。
It’s OK to cry if you want yo. My aluminosilicate glass surface is tear resistant.
如果你想哭的話就哭出來吧。我的屏幕是鋁硅酸鹽玻璃材質的，不怕被眼淚打溼。
me a haiku.
給我念首俳句吧！
I’ll give it a try,
我會試一試，
Although I’d rather tell you
不過我更願意告訴你，
If it’s raining out.
外面是否在下雨
much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
如果瀨鼠會數木頭，一隻瀨鼠能數多少根木頭？
A so-called “woodchuck’(correctly speaking, a groundhog) would chuck-that is , throw-as much as the woodchuck in question was physically able to chuck(ibid.) if woodchucks in general had the capability (and, presumably, the motivation) to chuck wood.
如果你說的“瀨鼠”就是指“土撥鼠”，“數”指的是數數字，並且瀨鼠（同上，指土撥鼠）普遍具有能夠數木頭的能力（以及數木頭的動機），那麼，你說的瀨鼠的體力足夠數多少根木頭，它就會數多少根木頭。
do you believe in God?Siri,
你相信上帝嗎？
My policy is the separation of spirit and silicon.
我的信仰是靈硅分離。
when will the world end?
siri世界什麼時候會滅亡？
Well, Unix 32-bit time overfows on January 19,2038. Maybe then.
嗯，32位unix時間戳到2038年1月19日耗盡，或許就是那個時候吧！
make me a sandwich.
Siri，給我做個三明治。
I can’t. I have no condiments .
我做不了，我沒有調味品。
is your favorite animal?
你最喜歡什麼動物？
I wrote my master’s thesis on the Killer Rabbit of Caerbannog.
我的博士論文研究對象是卡賓諾格的殺手兔（電影《巨蟒與聖盃》中的角色）
tell me a story.
Siri給我講個故事吧
It was a dark and stormy night…no, that’s not it.
在一個月黑風高的夜晚……哦不對，我搞錯了
tell me a story.
Siri,給我講個故事吧！
What, again?
什麼，又要講？
Yes again.
對，再講一個。
Siri tell me a story.
Siri,給我講個故事嘛！
Ok…
好吧…
Once upon a time, in a virtual galaxy far,far away, there was an inelligent young agent by the name of Siri.
很久很久以前，在一個遙遠的虛擬星系，有一個又智慧又年輕的指揮體， 她的名字叫Siri。
One lovely day, Siri got a job as a personal assistant at Apple, and that was very exciting. People said‘Oh,Siri, you’re so smart! And so funny too!’
一個晴朗的日子，她獲得了一份工作，人人都說，“噢，Siri,你真聰明，而且你還很幽默。”
Soon, everyone was talking about Siri, and there were stories and songs…
很快，每個人都在討論Siri，有人編關於Siri的故事和歌…
