美國總統做過的十大惡作劇(下)

in Coolidge Was A Strange Fellow

5.怪胎卡爾文·柯立芝

Coolidge was an odd man. He would literally go days without speaking a word, a trait that earned him the name "Silent Cal." Coolidge, however, loved childish pranks. His favorite prank was buzzing for his aides (or the Secret Service) and hiding from them. He hoped to make them think he had been kidnapped. In all likelihood, his feet sticking out from under the curtain probably gave him away.

古怪的柯立芝常常一天一句話也不說，因此被人們稱做"沉默的卡爾"。然而，柯立芝喜歡搞有點孩子氣的惡作劇，比如他最喜歡藏在他的助手或者特工身後並且發出好像他被綁架了的嗡嗡聲，不過因爲腳經常被垂到地面的窗簾絆倒才就此作罷。

He once had his aide fill up a bucket half with water and half with yellow beans. He then told the aide to scrub the brown spots off the beans. Finally, after some time, another staffer came along and told the aide that the only way to get the spots off was with a knife. Another time, at a presidential breakfast with the Congress, the President poured some coffee and cream into a saucer and indicated to the crowd to do the same. Coolidge then leaned down and gave the saucer to his dog. The message was received by the embarrassed crowd.

一次，柯立芝讓助手在水桶裏裝水和黃豆各半，洗掉這些黃豆上的污點。一會兒，他讓另一個人過來告訴助手只有用刀刮才能搞掉這些污點。後來在一次和國會議員吃早飯的過程中，他把咖啡奶油倒入茶碟中然後混在一起，並且示意衆人也這樣做。議員們面面相覷，十分尷尬。而他自己卻偷偷地把這些倒給了他的狗，不幸被人們逮了個正着。

ham Lincoln Made A Man Cry

4.把人弄哭的亞伯拉罕·林肯

Abraham Lincoln freed the slaves, protected the Union, and, perhaps unsurprisingly, suffered from horrible depression. Unbeknownst to most, though, he was an unrepentant jokester. We could just focus on his endless quips, but this article is about practical jokes. Early in his career, Lincoln had a debate with an opponent named Jesse Thomas. After Thomas gave his speech, Lincoln took the stage and decided simply to mimic his rival. Lincoln mocked his opponent's voice, exaggerated his movements, and had the crowd in fits. It was such a good caricature that it made his rival cry.

亞伯拉罕·林肯不僅廢除了黑人奴隸制度，還阻止了聯邦分裂。也許是因爲總統壓力過大，他不幸得了抑鬱症。不過最不爲人所知的其實是林肯也有幽默逗比的一面。在他事業的早期，他和他的對手傑西·托馬斯有一場辯論。在托馬斯演講結束後，林肯上臺決定模仿他的演講。林肯挖苦似的模仿對手的聲音，誇大他的動作，也讓觀衆跟着他一起做。就是這樣掉節操的模仿讓約翰遜哭了起來。

Dick Taylor was another opponent of Lincoln to experience a practical joke during a speech. Taylor decried Lincoln's "aristocratic" proclivities and extolled his own Spartan virtue. Lincoln sneaked on stage, pulled open Taylor's vest, and exposed a shirt decorated with frills and a gold watch chain. Taylor was furious and challenged Lincoln to a duel. Lincoln was allowed to choose the weapons and chose "cavalry broadswords of the largest size." The diminutive Taylor was not amused.

迪克·泰勒也是林肯的一次演講中的對手，同樣也成爲了他戲耍的對象。泰勒稱讚林肯具有貴族的氣質，又說自己很贊同林肯的斯巴達文化美德觀點。在泰勒演講時，林肯偷偷上臺，扒掉了泰勒的衣服，露出了他裏面穿的一件小襯衫和一條金錶帶。泰勒頓時勃然大怒，要跟林肯決鬥。不過林肯選騎兵隊用的最大號闊刀來當武器，這讓膽小的泰勒立馬蔫了。

F. Kennedy Could Get Mean

3.壞壞的約翰·菲茨傑拉德·肯尼迪

John F. Kennedy had a good friend named Lem Billings. Billings went on a trip to France, met Greta Garbo, and became a bit full of himself. He went so far as to tell Kennedy that he and Garbo were "an item." Kennedy decided he couldn't let such boastful actions go unpunished and set up a dinner at the White House for himself, Jackie, Billings, and Garbo. Kennedy scheduled Garbo to arrive early and told her his scheme. She was to pretend she had never met Billings before.

約翰·菲茨傑拉德·肯尼迪的好朋友雷姆·比林斯有一次去法國旅遊，碰到了葛麗泰·嘉寶。他有點小得意，告訴肯尼迪他現在和葛麗泰·嘉寶是一對。肯尼迪當然受不了好朋友這麼得瑟地跟自己顯擺，於是他在白宮設宴邀請傑基、比林斯和嘉寶。他特意讓嘉寶提早來，告訴了她他的小陰謀，讓她假裝從未見過比林斯。

When Billings showed up, beaming, he turned to enthusiastically greet his new love, but she only responded with an ice-cold, "I have never seen this man before." For the better part of an hour, they sat around and had an awkward dinner, while Billings pleaded and desperately tried to remind Garbo of their time together. Garbo just regarded him as a bug buzzing about her head. Kennedy, the unrepentant prankster, even pretended to offer suggestions, asking Billings if he might have met a Greta Garbo double. It must have been an unreal experience for the man, and you have to wonder if he questioned his sanity.

於是，當比林斯滿面笑容熱情洋溢地跟他喜歡的嘉寶打招呼時，她一臉冷漠，說"我壓根沒見過這個人"。晚宴剛開始的一個小時裏，氣氛一直很彆扭，比林斯不停地向嘉寶辯解希望她能記起之前跟他在一起的時光，而嘉寶就把他當作在身邊一直嗡嗡作響的臭蟲。坐在一邊的肯尼迪，這個惡作劇的主導者，假裝關心地勸比林斯遇到的可能是葛麗泰·嘉寶的雙胞胎姊妹，而不是她本人。這麼不着邊兒的瞎話可能比林斯本人聽過後會覺得自己是否真的認錯人，還是腦子有問題了。

klin D. Roosevelt Made A Poop Joke On NBC

上搞惡作劇的富蘭克林·德拉諾·羅斯福

Franklin D. Roosevelt loved to pull pranks. He would pull childish ones and elaborate ones alike. For instance, during his physical therapy in Warm Springs, he would trick his therapist into falling backward into the water. One time, he told a Secret Service member to get on the roof of a farm. He then had the ladder removed and drove away waving at the stranded serviceman. However, Roosevelt's best joke might have been one of the first prank calls in history.

富蘭克林·德拉諾·羅斯福特別喜歡搞惡作劇，尤其是孩子氣的惡作劇。比如，他在暖春醫院進行物理治療的那段時間裏經常作弄醫生掉進水裏。還有一次，他讓特工爬上一個農場的房頂，然後悄悄地挪開梯子上了車，向站在房頂愣神的特工說完拜拜後就驅車走了。不過，羅斯福歷史上最著名的一次惡作劇是他假冒別人的一次電話。

A few White House correspondents formed a singing group. They were invited to appear on NBC. While they were on the program, Roosevelt called the show. He disguised his famous voice and told the host he wanted to offer the men a contract. When asked who he worked for, the president responded, "I'm the advertising manager for the Cascarets," which was a famous laxative. At the next press meeting, the president revealed his joke by telling all of the other media personnel that the correspondents would need to resign, because they had a job singing on the "Cascaret Hour."

白宮的幾個通訊記者組成一個歌唱團，並受邀在美國全國廣播公司電視臺（NBC）表演節目。當記者們正在表演節目時，羅斯福掐着嗓子給節目組打電話說他想跟表演人員籤個合同。當被問到是做什麼的時，羅斯福說他是Cascarets瀉藥公司的廣告經理。第二天的新聞會議上，羅斯福告訴其他人通訊記者們可能需要辭職，因爲他們有了一份瀉藥公司的工作。

an's Cheeky Prank

1.過分的杜魯門

The buck may have stopped with Harry Truman, but conning a person into facing their phobia certainly did not. Truman was set to take a trip to South America, and a group of reporters were coming with him. One of them, Tony Vaccaro, was deathly afraid of needles and was very relieved that he did not have to get a painful yellow fever shot. When Truman found out about Vaccaro's fear, he decided to have some fun.

沒有什麼能擋住哈里·杜魯門用別人的恐懼症來捉弄人。杜魯門有一次被派去出行南非，隨同的還有一幫記者。他們當中有一個名叫託尼·瓦卡羅的記者特別害怕打針，去之前他確信他不用注射黃熱病疫苗。當杜魯門發現這時，他決定捉弄一下瓦卡羅。

Truman instructed a White House physician to tell Vaccaro that the policy had been changed, and the shots were no longer merely optional. Vaccaro began freaking out as he was essentially pushed into a clinic room while screaming, "I don't believe in shots!" When Vaccaro entered the office, he saw a giant hypodermic needle, the size a veterinarian would use on a horse, filled with a sinister red fluid. Vaccaro was terrified but turned around anyway. He had a job to do, and if it meant getting stabbed in the buttocks with his worst nightmare, by God, he was going to do it. The "doctor" then entered and told Vaccaro, "This won't hurt a bit, Tony." Vaccaro immediately recognized the President's voice. He felt immense relief and offered the priceless response (presumably while his pants were still down), "Mr. President, I do not usually greet Presidents of the United States from this position."

杜魯門讓白宮的一位醫生告訴瓦卡羅政策改了，疫苗注射不再是自願的了。瓦卡羅聽後開始坐立不安，當他被拉到診所時，一邊大叫"我不想打針！"一邊死活不想進。進去後，當他看到醫生拿着獸醫用的那種型號的裝滿紅色液體的注射器，想到這要扎到自己屁股上去，感到非常恐懼，但還是轉過身去做好打針準備，因爲他畢竟還要做這份工作，不能爲此丟了飯碗。一會兒，"醫生"進來對瓦卡羅說"這不會對你有什麼傷害，放輕鬆點，託尼"，這時瓦卡羅一下就認出這是總統的聲音，頓時如釋重負，回答說"總統先生，我通常不想在這種情況下跟您打招呼"（推測這時的瓦卡羅應該解開了褲子準備打針）。

翻譯：Time 來源：前十網